Sunday, January 13, 2013

Retreat or Community Conquest...Part Two.

Day Two - Saturday

Dawn broke on day two with the men in good spirits. We had survived day one of the attack from the women by getting the word out through an elaborate communication system consisting of smoke signals and Morse code. With knowledge of the plan out there and discovery that eggs and sausage are not just for breakfast we were all able to have a hearty dinner. Now attention turned to preparing for the day ahead.

As expected Nora got up in the morning, turned down my offer to help with breakfast, and prepared a sweet potato for herself; no offer was made by her to help Nigel or I. Further proof of the female plot for domination. Nigel and I had it covered, however, he with a bowl of cereal and me with more sausage and eggs.

Once breakfast was done I turned my attention to eating the rest of the weekend. Plans were made to tackle the shopping list. As I mentioned yesterday my experience owning a restaurant prepared me well for the challenges that lay ahead. We needed to launch a defensive plan.

First using my prior industry connections we ducked into Gracie's in Washington for lunch. Nora had chicken wings, Nigel enjoyed chicken tenders and I had a big grilled chicken salad. Once we were well fed we moved onto phase two of defense of the men.

Thanks to our communication system some of the men and I decided to band together for our dinner. I was charged with the task of procuring food for the evening. Once again using my restaurant connections, I went over to Cherry Garden in Washington and order two sushi platters for our meal.

With the evening meal taken care of it was time to tackle the shopping list. We drove out to Sam's and blew through the list with ease. I picked up every item and did not go off list at all. Nora even commented it was the most efficient Sam's trip she had ever been on. Severe cracks are now forming in the plan for conquest, and I could see the frustration in her eyes!

Once home and feeling confident I sat down to do what men do this time of year and watch a little playoff football before heading over to Josh's.

The plan was the same once we went over to the Yoders. He and I would eat sushi, sample some beers, and enjoy the game while the kids played. This is where we made a mistake. By Josh and I banding together we also brought together some of the womens foot soldiers.

Our daughters had managed to communicate to the women how well we were fighting back. They had to figure out some way to regain the upper hand. I still have not figured out how they did it, but somehow the women created a series of power outages in Eureka causing us to miss most of the second half of the San Francisco - Green Bay game. No doubt they thought this would drive the men insane and leave us in the confused, weakened state they were trying to accomplish through starvation. What they did not plan for, however, was our ability to communicate with men in neighboring communities. Once again by putting our smoke signals and Morse code in action we were able to stay in tune with the goings on of the game.

Good try women. I hope you enjoyed your "retreat", but I am proud to say you will return to a town full of strong and coherent men. You'll just have to try again next year!

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