The turn out was fantastic. A much stronger showing than the initial pollsters indicated. Seventy-four people had an opinion on my facial hair. The Beard-icans ran a great race, getting their message out to all demographics. While the Clean-ocrats sat back and just assumed the people wanted a change. When reached for a comment, Nigel, a powerful Beard-ican lobbyist, said "I am glad Daddy is putting his beard back on".
There have been whispers that Beard is in failing health or perhaps not ready for the rigors of his newly appointed post as he has not yet been seen since his victory. However, Chris, press secretary for Beard assured us today that beard is in fantastic health and ready to serve the people. He is simply taking some time off to rejuvenate and spend time with his family. We can expect a public appearance late next week.
Until then Beard has this official statement: " I would like to thank all of my supporters for getting out and making your voices heard. To those of you who did not vote for me, as a compromise I promise to stay trimmed and well kept through out my tenure. See you all soon."